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“Batman vs. Superman”: The 10 reasons why Superman sucks!

Batman vs Superman: The 10 reasons why Superman sucks!

For many years I have used that “expresion” when I compare things that are equally good.

For example, U2 vs. Bruce Springsteen,  it was like comparing Batman vs. Superman. But recently, I have come to the conclusion that it is not true, so I will show you 10 reasons to prove it.

The 10 reasons why Superman sucks!

  • 1. – Let’s be honest … that RED slip/thong  is not too trendy
  • 2. – Superman can fly, see through almost anything, stop bullets. Batman has no superpowers, so it makes use of “scientific knowledge, detective skills and physical dexterity”
  • 3. – Superman needs to work as a journalist. Batman is the Heir of the private technology firm Wayne Enterprises. He is the Hot, Cute and Supergeek. Tremble… Mark Zuckerberg!!
  • 4. – Needless to say that Batman has the coolest  technological devices (the Batcave, the Lab, a suit, a batmobil, etc …). Even Wolowitz would become a monk only to have the Batman utility belt.
  • 5. – Look at Superman’s hair, that curl is pretty fuzzy. No offense, but it seems a model of Tommy Hilfiger.
  • 6. – Do not trust a guy who get naked in public places.
  • 7. – Superman scripts has no scientific basis as evidenced  Sheldon Cooper on TBT. “Penny: Yes, I know men can’t fly. Sheldon: No, no let’s assume that they can. Lois Lane is falling, accelerating at an initial rate of 32ft per second, per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Ms. Lane, who is now traveling at approximately 120 miles per hour, hits them, and is immediately sliced into three. equal pieces.”.  Just in case…Superman, please don´t rescue me!
  • 8. – Superman is vintage. Batman as the British newspaper The Guardian wrote: “.. is both an icon and a commodity: the perfect cultural artifact for the XXI century.”
  • 9. – Batman is darker, more complex, more real. Superman is a bit simple, naiff and too soft. In addition, Chistian Bale despite his anger is much much hotter.
  • 10. -I don’t want to sound xenophobic, but Guys: Superman is an ALIEN. Batman is one of us.
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